What does identity mean?

     What is one’s identity? That is a fairly vague question as it differs with each person. Looking at Deming Guo, I believe his identity is his culture. I mostly say this because he had a coherent identity – regardless of whether it conformed to the expectations set by his mother (such as going past 8^th grade which I mentioned in my note page) – while he still lived with his mother, Leon, Vivian, and Michael. His early childhood was filled with cultural experiences and he had no reason to veer away from them or ignore their influence on him. However, when Deming becomes Daniel and lives with Kay and Peter Wilkinson, this connection to his background is broken. He is not even allowed to speak in Fuzhounese anymore (I mentioned how he must talk in English only once he lives with Kay and Peter in the notes). This causes him to be completely confused about who he is and where he belongs. Furthermore, Kay and Peter attempt to assimilate into their “American culture” by placing him in a mostly white school and having him eat and live in the “American” style.” Simply put, they are trying to overwrite Daniel’s identity with one that fits their own standards. It is important to note they are not intentionally trying to confuse and destroy Daniel as they believe his new lifestyle is better than anything he has previously experienced.

     However, as Daniel loses grip on his own identity through internal conflicts and is simultaneously being forced to assimilate, he engages in rebellious behavior. While he was still Deming, this rebellious behavior was apparent as he would attempt to trick his mother into believing he did his homework; but this behavior was in moderate amounts as his identity controlled the extent of his actions. However, with no coherent identity to restrain him anymore, he is let loose. The combination of the lack of identity, with the lack of trust (his mother left him so he believes that anyone who says they love him could leave him), and the forcing of the “American” way, only leads to a complete deterioration of the character itself.

    This is perfectly exemplified during Daniel’s college years. He directly lies to his American parents about attending classes and caring about college. His true passion is music, but he gets nervous on stage and screws up. He no longer trusts himself to do anything. His sense of belonging in this world is seemingly nonexistent.

     It’s possible to argue that if he had have remained with his Chinese family, this character destruction would never have happened. That may be true, but I do not necessarily see this as the sole fault of assimilation (or attempted assimilation). Rather, it is in this specific case where Deming’s identity is his culture and background, thus, when attempting to ignore it and accept a new background, he is unable to do so. In short, the forcible pressure on Daniel to disconnect himself from Deming merely acts as the catalyst.